Pies and Lies
by sas.90
Summary: You should see him on stakeouts. He just talks and talks.' Bones and Booth are on a stakeout. What will Booth talk and talk about this time?


Hello there! Last night, after watching the Man in the Mud, I decided to try and write an ''all conversation fic'' or I guess you could call it a dialogue. I've never done this before so it's a little expirment, but I had to get it out of my system. Had had enough of studying maths, gotta start again today. Just twoooo more weeks and then there's a two week holiday. Can't wait! Anyway, on with the fic.

**Disclaimer; **I don't own Bones, if I did I wouldn't be staring at formulas that I don't understand anyway.

**Spoilers; **For the Man in the Mud (3.11)

**ps. **Special thanks to Afifi for helping me on this one.

**Pies and Lies**

''Cherry?''

''No.''

''Custard?''

''Nope.''

''Pumpkin?''

''Booth..''

''Not even apple crumble? You gotta like apple crumble pie.''

''I don't like pie, Booth. It's too sweet. I'd rather have a salad or a healthy snack.''

''Oh. You're _that_ kind of person._''_

''What? What kind of person? Why are you huffing?''

''Never mind Bones, forget it.''

''No. Booth. What kind of person am I?''

''Well you know..''

''Obviously I don't know. Would I be asking you this question if I knew what kind of person you think I am?''

''You're a healthy person, okay? You know what you gotta do, Bones? Live a little. Act crazy, have a hamburger every once in while. Or pie. You'll like it.''

''Booth there is nothing wrong with being healthy. Several scientific tests have proved that eating healthy can avoid several cases and conditions like heartattacks, obesity, diabetes..''

''Ooh and because it's been 'scientifically proved' that means it's right.''

''Yes.''

''...''

''And now you're out of comebacks. I won another argument.''

''Bones, you did not win that argument.''

''Yes I did, because you were speechless.''

''Whoa, hey, I was not speechless. I was trying to form, my respsonse, but you didn't even give me the time to say it out loud.''

''Okay, then I will give you the time now.''

''Yes. Wait, what? Oh. What I was trying to say.. is that I don't always eat healthy, but I work out. I've never had a heartattack, I don't suffer from diabetes. Plus, you gotta admit. My body looks pretty good, right? No obesity for me. There, you see what I did there? I went and proved your scientific proof guys wrong.''

''They're not my 'scientific proof guys' and just wait until you're forty, Booth. Your muscles will start to detoriate. It'll be harder for you to keep your body in shape. You might get diabetes or a heartattack.''

''So now you're trying to win this argument by hoping I will get a heartattack? Jeez, Bones. Very subtle.''

''I didn't say that. I was merely trying to state that your body will not always look this.. well structured.''

''You think my body is well structured?''

''Well... can we talk about something else?''

''Hey, at least I wasn't talking about work.''

Silence.

''Booth, stop tapping your pen on the steeringwheel.''

''Fine. Alright. There, it's gone. Happy?''

''Happier, yes.''

Silence.

''You know what? I think Sweets enjoyed that night of bowling with us.''

''He would have if you'd let him win.''

''What?''

''He would have enjoyed the night if you'd let him win. He had just been dumped by his girlfriend. It would've been good for his ego to win, but you had to go alpha male on us and insisted on winning. You made that dumpster look on his face even worse.''

''Not 'dumpster', Bones. Dumpy. Dumpy look. And I did not insist on winning, I could've gone all out, you know, but I figured I'd be nice.''

''See, you're doing it again.''

''Doing what again?''

''Showing your alpha male tendecies. You're bragging, trying to impress me.''

''I'm not trying to impress you, I'm telling the truth.''

''I don't need Dr. Sweets to be able to tell that you're lying.''

''Bones, I'm not lying, okay? I'm good at bowling. I've won awards, you've seen my t-shirt.''

''You still could've let him win.''

''Fine, next time, you know, we go bowling, I'll let him win, but I can already tell you that he'll know I'll be lying about my bowling skills and his ego will still be similar to the ego of a twelve year old.''

''Dr. Sweets is twenty-three.''

''Whatever, Bones.''

Silence.

''You don't even like banoffee pie?''

''Booth...''

* * *

Well I´m quite happy with how it turned out:) What do you think? Reviews are what makes me happy in these days of studying maths for my big important test:)


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